Entries in Just Plain Silly (12)
Simply Brilliant, or Brilliantly Simple Department
Senator Harry Reid (Dimwit, NV) says, and I quote: “We’ve got to stop using fossil fuel.”
James Lileks, in a beautifully trenchant bit of reasoning, has a terrific first step for stopping fossil fuel use:
There’s only one sensible response: we have to shut down Las Vegas. Yes, I know, they get their power from hydro, but juice is fungible; the power that goes to light up Vegas could be used to take oil-fired plants off the grid. Closing down Vegas would reduce Nevada’s carbon footprint in other ways: a quarter of all tourists come from California, and I’d wager they drive. (Or drive to wager.) Thirty-six million visit Vegas each year – at least three million people a month arrive and depart from the airport on pollution-spewing fossil-fuel consuming planes.
There is no practical reason for Vegas to exist. Surely this is a luxury we can do without; surely Nevada can find other sources of revenue to fund the government. If Las Vegas does not voluntarily cease operations, I call upon the Senate to either ban flights entirely, or impose a luxury surcharge equal to 110% of the ticket price, because Las Vegas and the waste it represents is ruining the world.
Surely, Senator Reid can get behind that proposal, if fossil fuels are the evil he seems to think they are.
Roy M. Jacobsen
in Modern Life, Better Living Through..., Just Plain Silly
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Random Questions Department
When did "boat-load" and "buck-naked" become "butt-load" and "butt-naked?"
Could they become "booty-load" and "booty-naked?"
(Cross-posted at Writing, Clear and Simple.)
Roy M. Jacobsen
in Just Plain Silly
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What’s In A Name Department
If you haven’t already done so, please participate in this vital scientific study: Do you call it soda, pop, coke, or something else?
Roy M. Jacobsen
in Modern Life, Just Plain Silly
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Lifestyles Of The Something Or Other Department
I'm living a dream.
The one where I can't find my pants.
Roy M. Jacobsen
in Just Plain Silly
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Dyslexic Shakespeare Department
My middle daughter has a small role in her high school's production of one of the Shakespeare's comedies. For some reason, my mind insists on twisting the title to "Nothing Much About A Do," a play in which a big party turns out to be a minor affair after all.
Roy M. Jacobsen
in Just Plain Silly
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Thought Of The Day Department
"I'm really in touch with my inner bird."
--Eldest Outlandish Child
[She works at a pet store, and apparently they had bird-on-the-loose issues today.]
Health Alert Department
Tom McMahon warns us about a new disease:
A Rare Combination of Bird Flu And Herpes
. . . it's called Chirpees. A canarial disease, and in its final stages it's virtually untweetable.
That's horrible. I love it.
Not Quite What It Means Department
From Middle Child this morning:
"Do you think that, when answering machines were a new thing, kids would get confused and ask them questions? That would be handy."
World-Class Spellign Department
Spotted at a nearby convenience store:
They'd get a lot farther with me if they'd quit calling me "Toady."
The saddest thing is that it has been this way for several weeks now. Doesn't anybody who works there read their own sign?